Tuesday, September 23, 2008

Just STOP It -- It's NOT Okay

I was reading the following statement by Jim Rohn and thought, no it is not okay if I am around and listening to negative people. Jim Rohn's statement was this: "You must constantly ask yourself these questions: Who am I around? What are they doing to me? What have they got me reading? What have they got me saying? Where do they have me going? What do they have me thinking? And most important, what do they have me becoming? Then ask yourself the big question: Is that okay?" Jim Rohn

That paragraph reminded me of a lesson plan my good friend and mentor, Bob Bassett, wrote on one of our weekly mastermind calls. Each week we read and discuss one chapter from Napoleon Hill's book, Think & Grow Rich. This week's chapter was Decision -- The Mastery of Procrastination. With Bob's permission, I am sharing his lesson with you.

Beginning of Bob's lesson

We've been wondering a long time, and more so lately ...

"Why don't spouses support each other?"

This is Hill's phrase from Chapter 8 that struck me this time:

"Close friends and relatives, while not meaning to do so, often handicap one through 'opinions' and sometimes through ridicule, which is meant to be humorous. Thousands of men and women carry inferiority complexes with them all through life, because some well-meaning, but ignorant person destroyed their confidence through 'opinions' or ridicule."

I've been listening to Robert Anthony lately,and I can now with confidence disagree with Napoleon Hill on this one ...

People who ridicule you are NOT well meaning, even though they cloak their comments with sugary phrases that sound as though they have your best interests at heart.

They DO NOT.

People who ridicule you DO NOT intend to be humorous, even though they cloak their comments with a nervous laugh, hoping no one questions the source of their nervousness.

They are NOT trying to be funny or amuse you.

People who ridicule you ARE NOT ignorant.

They may plead ignorance of your feelings, but be assured that they know EXACTLY what they are doing, perhaps not on a conscious level, but they DO know what they are doing.

They are trying to bring you down.

They NEED to bring you down.

We've all heard the crabs in the bucket story where when one crab tries to climb out of the bucket, the other crabs reach up and pull the escapee back down.

Robert Anthony tells us that people must dismiss and trivialize our goals and dreams because if they listened to us, they would have to question their own lives and think about the dreams they have abandoned.

Too scary for most.

Better to mock than look within.

Bob Dylan says it best in It's Alright Ma (I'm Only Bleeding)

"For them that must obey authority
That they do not respect in any degree
Who despise their jobs, their destinies
Speak jealously of them that are free
While one who sings with his tongue on fire
Gargles in the rat race choir
Bent out of shape from society's pliers
Cares not to come up any higher
But rather get you down in the hole
That he's in."

So this is my advice:

Every time you hear an opinion about your new venture, or a phrase that contains the phrase "you should", or a joking remark that stings, or any reminder of what you used to be, or where you came from, and how you will never be any better even though you know you can be, or any comment at all that feels like dogs leaping from the ditch and snapping rabidly at the wheels of your new vehicle,


Stop and ask yourself ...

Why does this person need to bark at me?

What is this person afraid of?

Does this person have my best interests at heart?

What will happen to this person if I change?

Why does this person want me to remain as I am and not grow as I want to grow?

What would I lose if I increased the distance between myself and this person?

And then stop again and ask yourself ...

"Why did I begin this adventure if I didn't intend to complete it?"

"Will I allow others to keep me from my dream?"

Tough choices and tough decisions.

Follow your heart and go back to the beginning of this chapter where Hill tells us to make decisions quickly and change them slowly.

It's YOUR life.

Make a decision NOW about how you are going to live it.

Change that decision slowly, if at all.

End of Bob Bassett's lesson

Wasn't that a great lesson? If you have taken the time to ask both Jim Rohn's and Bob Bassett's questions and realize you are challenged by other supposedly well-meaning people, and you desire to team up with those who desire to help you get out of the bucket, join us on those weekly mastermind calls. If your past thoughts have you going in the direction you don't want to go, send me an email @ irma.white@gmail.com for more information on how you can think & grow rich.

Finally, if your mind is constantly bombarded with limited beliefs, self-defeating and other negative thoughts, JUST STOP IT!

Be Empowered to Prosper!

Irma White
A Mentor With a Servant's Heart

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1 comment:

James C. said...

A great read. I totally agree with your comments and brief lesson. There are many unfulfilled dreams in cemeteries everywhere because of comments made that were not meant to harm...and then some of them were. Great lesson. Thanks.

James C.